Saturday, February 6, 2016

I Am Nessie

            Humans think they’re so clever.
            It’s amusing how such a young species can think that they’re the only intelligent beings in their world; that there are no other creatures or beings that can outsmart them with their technology, their “highly-developed brains”, and their opposable thumbs. The fault in that line of thinking is that they’re wrong. There are greater and more intelligent creatures out there. I should know. I’m one of them.
            The humans have many names for my family and I. Water Horses, the monsters, plesiosaurs, Loch Ness Beast, etc. “Nessie” is the particular nickname I like to go by. Over the past few centuries, those humans who have been observant enough to catch glimpses of us have surrounded our very existence with a shroud of mystery. For such a dense race, these humans do love their mysteries. I must admit to being a little flattered by such attention. It’s not every day that one becomes a legend, even if it is to a mere subspecies.
            I remember one occasion, a little over 1,200 years ago, when one little man actually tried to put a spell on me. From what my friends told me later, this particular human called himself “Saint Columba,” and he had come to “save the souls of the people of Scotland.” I was still a young pup, venturing out further than I had ever gone in the daytime. These tiny, insignificant creatures were fascinating to me. Conveniently, there was a human swimming not too far from my cave, so I had decided to get a closer look so I could observe the mannerisms of this unusual creature. Just as I was close enough to really see anything, there was suddenly this small man with a shiny head, brandishing his hand at me and yelling something that I couldn’t yet understand. So I swam off. (Lyons.)
            You know, it can get rather boring and monotonous at the bottom of this lake. After this incident with the saint, my family and I devised a form of entertainment involving the humans. What fun it would be, we said, to see what they would do if we were to ever make our presence known. It became a game: who could cause the most dramatic of reactions? For years, we had to wait for people to come to the lake. But then, the humans built a hardened portal for their transportation right next to our shore. Soon, it was easy to frighten a herd of human beings without much movement on our part. (Staff, 2009)
            Of course, we can’t be seen too often. If we made ourselves commonly known, where would the fun be? No; at my suggestion, my pod and I have made it a point to only make an appearance only every so often. As for me, I prefer to target the more reputable audience. How fun it is to appear to those humans who think of themselves as more intelligent than the rest of their species, and to have them question their own intelligence! (Lyons) I must confess to finding a great deal of secret pleasure in that.
            Although we always seem to have the upper hand, these creatures have been quite innovative in their desires to prove our existence. They seem to have even come up with a way to use bursts of sound to find objects underwater. That is certainly creative. I must say, the sound waves have been less than amusing for my family, as it tends to scare our food away, one must admit that these humans are determined. (Woollaston, 2014.) I do have to wonder, though, why they don’t trust their fancy contraptions. If these machines work, and tell then that we’re down here, then why are there so many who still question that fact?
            My favorite, though, has been watching many different men try to find (or create) their own proof of our existence. The most creative and yet amusing tactic I’ve seen yet has been the men who attached wood to a strange floating machine, and then drove it around in the moonlight. (Martin & Boyd) Strange behavior for any species… It seemed rather pointless. However, only a short time after they had done that, the peaceful shores of our lake were overrun with all types of people, our water was suddenly crowded with a great deal more sailing boats, and an amazing amount of new netting was dragged over the bottom of the lake. Inconvenient, to be sure, but they still have yet to find us for sure.
            Over thousands of years, my noble family has survived and thrived undetected under the waves of this sturdy little neck of waterway. Truly, these humans must realize that we have all been around the block a time or two, surviving and hiding to survive the most fearsome of predators and other threats. Although their efforts are admirable, they have no idea what they’re up against.
            Humans think they’re so clever. We shall see. This young species can’t even locate a pod of creatures like us on the bottom of such a small lake… and they believe themselves to be the ones with the hyper-developed intelligence complexes? Ha.

Works Cited:

Lyons, Stephen. “The Legend of Loch Ness.” NOVA. WGBH Educational Foundation.
22 January, 1999. Web. 24 January, 2016.

Staff, “Today in History: Loch Ness Monster Sighted: May 02, 1933.”
History Channel. 2009. Web. 25 January, 2016.

Martin, D. & Boyd, A. (1999). Nessie: The Surgeon's Photograph Exposed. Thorne

Woollaston, Victoria. “Has sonar finally found the Loch Ness Monster?” Daily Mail,

UK. 1 May, 2014. Web. 25 January, 2016.

(Created as an assignment for English 2010 at USU.)

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